(failed) Detox

I took the Cinch 5 day fast forward challenge to shed the rest of the baby weight. I went into this thinking it was the answer to all my problems only to find my heart revealed.

Spinach, eggs, almonds, raspberries, and almonds are good to eat, right? I like them individually but found on day 2 that I would actually begin gagging at the thought of eating these items and finally chose hunger over eating. Yup, lasted two days. I just couldn't do it. I wasn't happy with the way I was so detox was the answer only to find I wasn't happy with that either. Now, those two days were successful and I am back in my pre-maternity clothes (yay!) and to think if I had stayed on the full 5 days, I might have seen even better results.

The deal is, I am trying to fix my self image problem and failing. This past weekend's message was about as humans we try to fix things only to make another problem instead of trusting God. Convicted. I am not fully trusting God. I do with my mouth, but not my heart. I am fearfully and wonderfully made, a woman who fears the Lord-she is to be praised, my imperishable beauty should be a gentle and quiet spirit. Praying that these verses aren't just knowledge, but belief.

I will say that good or bad, the Lord will let me know, it did make me feel a bit better about myself but my identity can't come from a number on scale or on my pants.

My focus should be to be a good steward with the food I eat and the body I've been given and to thank God that he provides.

I might be a loser for quitting, but I am a 4 lbs lighter loser :) And that is something I can live with.